The good news is that there are an abundance of “poop chute” models on Maker World that you can print. They catch the poop and channel it down into a bin. Nerds are so weird.
So, I totally forgot that my 3D printer has a little opening in the back through which it ejects purged filament (colloquially known as “poop”) between filament changes. There was a *lot* of poop hiding behind the cabinets. Oops!